Streetrunner
Our treadmill is still broken and awaiting a new control panel/sensor/capacitor (I assume this is the part that likes to mess with me mentally by randomly slowing down so that 2-3 seconds go by without the distance changing), so we decided to run outside. Here’s how that worked out: Shoes: Oh hey, our mesh exterior lets in ALL the cold air! Face: Um, why are we running into the wind? You know it’s only 30 degrees out, right? And you saw how that giant American flag at the fire station was completely horizontal, yes? Hands: We’re covered with gloves and yet we’re still freezing! Lungs: Uh…you remembered to take your inhaler first, right? Brain: CRAP. Lungs: It’s cool. We’ll just repay you later with a 5-minute coughing fit. Nothing we love better than cold air crackling in our asthma-infected tissues! Legs: No me gusta. Shoes: HA! We became untied already — 3 minutes in. New record! Eyes: How is Jason so far ahead of us so soon??? Jerkwad’s driveway/sidewalk: Hey, hope you enjoyed dodgi...